Managing (Ugly) Procrastinators

One of my Finnish MBA students told he that he had learned the word “procrastinate” from an American colleague.  Oh, great.  Yet another negative association for the US.

I’d like to tell you that I never procrastinate and thus establish myself as your role model.  Oops.  That said, I don’t often think of myself as procrastinating; I’m “circling”—getting a good view of the entire situation from all perspectives before I dive in.  You’re buying this, right?

Ugly Procrastinators

Procrastination gets ugly when victim mentality kicks in--when the act of putting off becomes the act of making excuses or placing blame.  Sometimes procrastination morphs into outright avoidance—denying that the issue is really a problem and, therefore, avoiding it in hopes that it will go away. 

I’m guessing that if you are reading this newsletter, you might, um, “circle” from time to time, but I’m also guessing that neither blaming nor avoiding is your style. 

Unfortunately, we all know those self-proclaimed victims who make excuses for their problems, usually by blaming someone else.  We also know people who simply won’t recognize that a problem exists in order to avoid taking action toward a solution.  Sometimes they are family, and you are stuck with them.  Sometimes they are colleagues, and you have to work with them.

In either case, you have a communication challenge:  How do you convince the Blamer or the Avoider to get busy and get to work?

Old Model, Another Application

If you are a former client or student, you won’t be surprised that I am going to offer you an application of an organizational plan that you have seen before:  The Bad News Model.  But this time, we’re applying it to assertively nudging a procrastinator along.  The steps (expanded a little—assertiveness with Blamers and Avoiders requires extreme measures) should look familiar:

1. Express recognition 
2. Transition into your purpose
3. Define inappropriate behavior
4. Explain consequences
5. Specify required action
6. Describe potential rewards
7. Offer help
8. Imply expected response
9. Close with motivation

Express recognition.  Tell the person that you recognize his/her feelings. “Recognize” is different from “understand” or even “appreciate,” but it does validate that the feeling the person has is real to him/her.  You can recognize feelings of anger, frustration, or helplessness. 

Transition into the purpose of your message.  “However” works but implies the bad news to come (so it might be the perfect word you want to use).  I like “that said” or “on the other hand”.

Define the inappropriate behavior from your perspective. Avoid finger-pointing, which is likely to cause a defensive response.  Instead, try something like “In my experience at work, I have seen many people who…” or “I am concerned that [a bad thing] is going to happen to you if you continue to …”. 

Explain consequences.  Describe those “bad things” that happen to people who behave this way.  Don’t be generic.  Use examples that Blamers or Avoiders can specifically relate to, based on their experience and knowledge base.  Be careful to sound objective and rational, not like you are personally threatening them.

Specify required action.  “Specify” is the important word here.  Be specific about the necessary actions.  Explain exactly what do you want the person to do.

Describe potential rewards.  The rewards for action should be as explicit as the consequences for no action.  And, of course, the rewards should personally relate to the needs and desires of the Blamer or Avoider, not to what sounds great to you (remember that their work ethic does not equal yours, so their reward system is different).

Offer help.  Do not, however, offer the Blamer or Avoider an opportunity to off-load the work onto you.  No one buys into a solution or a process unless he/she participates in the decision or the effort.  Suggest baby steps—actions that are reasonable and possible from the Blamer or Avoider’s perspective.  Don’t convey the sense that it will be easy for them.  They will perceive your disregard of the difficulty as insulting.  (Even if you are so frustrated that you don’t care how insulted they are, remember that insulted people will not take the action you want.)

Imply expected response.  Do not say: “So, what are you going to do about it?”  Rather, try a statement that expresses your belief that the Blamer or Avoider will actually follow through.  Try something like: “When we meet tomorrow, I’ll be happy to look at your first draft.”

Close with motivation.  Compare this challenge to something the Blamer or Avoider has overcome in the past.  “I know you can do [this] because you did [that].”

Let’s look at an example:  the team member who won’t carry his weight.  He’s an Avoider.  We’ll call him Clark.  Let’s also assume that Clark is not a subordinate, so you cannot require certain behavior from him.

Clark, I recognize that you think that this project is useless busy work. (Express recognition.) 

That said, (Transition into your purpose.)

…we all need to work on it as a team and finish by Friday, (Define inappropriate behavior.)

…or we could lose this client. (Explain consequences.)

I need for you to do the research and write your piece of the plan by tomorrow.  (Specify required action.)

If we do this well, we will get a larger budget next quarter, and we’ll be able to do some very cool work for this client that will look good for all of us in the long term.  (Describe potential rewards.)

The project we did for Client ABC is similar, if you need a template or some ideas.  (Offer help.)

When the team gets together tomorrow, we can pass around the individual pieces and edit each other’s work.  (Imply expected response.)

I remember how you wrote the XYZ proposal on your own practically overnight, so I know you can pull this off.  (Close with motivation.)

Another example:  Judy the Blamer, who doesn’t like her job.  She’s your colleague and friend.  Note the nine steps:

1. Judy, I hear you talking so often lately about how you don’t like your job since you have a new manager. 
2. However,
3. …I am concerned that your unhappiness might be affecting the quality of your work. 
4. If your customers get negative vibes from you, they are going to have a bad experience in our [store, office] and that’s going to affect how much money they spend—which ultimately is going to affect your performance reviews.
5. I think you need to request another assignment or look for another job…
6. …so that you can use all your skills and work in a better environment for you.  And you’ll probably make more money because you’ll be doing something you like. 
7. There are some great websites with jobsearch information, and every company has a Webpage for potential employees.  I’ll help you identify them. 
8. Why don’t you see what’s out there and then bring some pages and your resume when we have lunch next week? 
9. You have so much experience that I know you can find a position that you would find fulfilling. 

One last example: The Blaming Avoider for whom time is running out.

1. I know you are angry about being laid off and that you think it is neither fair nor justified. 
2. That said,
3. …your job will end in four weeks, and you can’t continue doing nothing about it.
4. In four weeks, you will be unemployed without access to an office or high-speed internet.
5. You need to update your resume, start making calls, and set up informative interviews today. 
6. If you can get the process going, you will have a better attitude and more bargaining power when you negotiate your next job package.  You are also more likely to have time without pay. 
7. I’d be happy to do a mock interview with you to be sure you are selling your best side. 
8. Let’s do that tomorrow over coffee. 
9. I’ve known you for so long, and every change you make is always for the better.  This one will be for the better, as well. 

Remember the Steps

Nine steps are a lot, but Blamers and Avoiders probably haven’t responded to simpler communication and require a more complex strategy:

1. Express recognition 
2. Transition into your purpose
3. Define inappropriate behavior
4. Explain consequences
5. Specify required action
6. Describe potential rewards
7. Offer help
8. Imply expected response
9. Close with motivation

Keep in mind that everything you say must be based on their wants and needs—not yours.  Also remember that your goal is to get the behavior you want and need.  Of course, reaching your goal is also in their best interest.  You might feel guilty of a little manipulation, but then, don’t feel too guilty.  It’s benevolent manipulation.  They are the Blamers and Avoiders.  You have to do what’s necessary.  This application of the Bad News Model and a little courageous assertiveness may be all it takes. 

Would you like to reply to this article?  If you try this strategy and have success, please let me know.  Email me:  Sherron@ChinUp.net.  I’d love to hear from you.